I'd trade my slow, sad love songs and chocolate chip cookies just to not feel like this.
Like certain pieces of me will never fit together unless someone helps solve the puzzle. Against the hoards of evidence that I'm not, I just can't help feeling alone. Trapped in my own mind; my own heart.
The lack of understanding or effort causes my smile to fade and my eyes to glisten when the piano tinkles softly through my speakers.
Don't take this as a sign of weakness or a plea for help. If you assumed the former, you must not understand the true strength it takes to accept these feelings. If you assumed the latter, I appreciate your concern or compassion, yet (please don't take this too harshly) it is unneeded.
There are no words to fully describe the dull, empty, longing ache that resonates from somewhere in my chest.
It is a feeling that you must experience firsthand; you have to feel the pain in order to appreciate the pleasure.
I miss the comfort of my father's hug, the warmth of my mother's smile, and the understanding of my sister. I don't want to be scared of what's to come, yet I can't avoid it. I miss my past and I think that I may miss my future. Am I on the path that I'm supposed to be? To become the woman that I desire to be?
So simple, yet so hard to illustrate with mere words. Family, friends, love, longing, tears, trying times, safe and sound, soulmates.
Interpret this as you will.
I'm returning to my sweet love songs that I wish would be sung to me, but I continue singing to myself.
Maybe, right now, that's okay....
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